‘My feelings are all over the place and I feel like I have no purpose, is this normal?’
When you are bereaved you may feel deep sadness, intense loneliness, despair, numbness or disbelief that the person is gone. Life may feel like it has no purpose, and even the smallest of tasks may feel too much to tackle. Guilt is a common feeling, especially about what was or was not said and/or done before the death. Or you may find yourself feeling guilty because you laughed, or realised you went a few minutes without thinking of the deceased. You may feel angry, perhaps with yourself, those involved in the care of the deceased, or the deceased themselves for leaving you to cope alone. It is also common to feel resentful of others who still have the ‘lost’ person around them; husbands who have wives, families with a dad and so on. This does not mean you are a bad person; you are just feeling the enormity of your loss. Relief can be another common feeling, especially after a difficult or prolonged illness, though this too can be a very painful emotion to deal with. The early days, weeks and months can often pass with you feeling like you are in some kind of bubble, disconnected from the world and those around you.